10 Things You Can Learn About a Guy in 3 Dates or Less

I came across this little tidbit and couldn't help sharing with you. Interesting to get a man's perspectie on this... What do you think?


10 Things You Can Learn About a Guy in 3 Dates or Less

There are no absolutes in the world, save for the whole bit about death and taxes. This is espe­cially true in the dat­ing world. Dat­ing web­sites are sup­posed to help us with this, to a degree. How­ever, peo­ple tend to fluff them­selves and fil­ter out key pieces of infor­ma­tion aka “deal break­ers.” Get­ting to know some­one is fun, but the prob­lem is that it takes time… No one wants to waste time. So I’m gonna give the ladies a lit­tle some­thin’ some­thin’ to help with fil­ter­ing out men they may not be into.

1.Messy or Clean? - There’s a dif­fer­ence between a guy who lives per­fectly pris­tine, mildly mess or OMGWTFBBQFTL is that an Opos­sum watch­ing ‘Weeds’ on your couch, with the remote!!!? If you dig some­one who is metic­u­lous and, per­haps, a bit obses­sive with clean­li­ness this guy may be for you. A mildly messy guy shows some­one who is lose, goes with the flow and is open minded. They could also be sloppy, or just a bit lazy, if not imma­ture. Some­one liv­ing in what seems like the rem­nants of Cher­nobyl is some­one that has more issues going on than just their liv­ing area. Be pre­pared and bring your gloves.

2.Traf­fic: Man, traf­fic sucks, or You piece of @#$% go @#$% your­self!!!—A man’s tem­pera­ment should be a key indi­ca­tor to the suc­cess of any rela­tion­ship you look to jump into. A guy curs­ing at and run­ning cars off the road is a sure warn­ing sign, or it should be. Maybe you like guys with anger man­age­ment issues… It’s pos­si­ble to be too upset and too mel­low, they are extreme sides of the same coin, really. If a guy doesn’t care he’s just been cut off and put in dan­ger, then that could indi­cate that the guy doesn’t stand up for himself.

3.Pub­lic Dis­plays of Affec­tion (PDA) - As with the ‘Three Bears Story,’ there’s too much, too lit­tle and just right. Obvi­ously, it’s up to you to know which is right for you. A guy that’s hold­ing you and grop­ing you, oth­er­wise smoth­er­ing you, out in pub­lic prob­a­bly has a need to show you off, or to show that he’s got some­one and that the world needs to know about it. It’s val­i­da­tion, in some way. If the guy’s roman­tic way to end an evening is with a fist bump, then he’s prob­a­bly not sure if he’s really into you or not, or could be lack­ing confidence.

4.What Does he Order for Din­ner?—What your guy orders can be telling also. Is he a mac and cheese kind of guy. Does he avoid the hip eatery around the cor­ner? Does he run and hide at the men­tion of a late night taco truck run? Is he oth­er­wise happy with Ham­burger helper? These are not inher­ently bad things. They just serve as a gauge for you to know how open he is to dif­fer­ent things. Some­one that isn’t into exotic foods, or just try­ing new and dif­fer­ent places may be some­one not keen for try­ing too many dif­fer­ent things…

5.How Does He Pre­fer to Com­mu­ni­cate?—Does your guy send you text mes­sages all the time? Does he take the time to call? If he has to break his plans will call, email or text you? If he calls you more often than not, espe­cially when some­thing comes up, this indi­cates that he’s a bit more con­sid­er­ate and able to pony up and “be a man” when things get rough. If he’s tex­ting a lot, or email­ing, he may just not be sure if he’s com­pletely into you, or sim­ply, he may not be as mature as you’d like.

6.His Group of Friends. —The entourage that he rolls with; who do the con­sist of? Are they high school friends, nearly exclu­sively? Or is it a pretty good mix of peo­ple from var­i­ous stages of his life? If he keeps the com­pany of the peo­ple that he’s known since high school (aka for­ever) then he may have issues with trust and/or could be averse to change or step­ping out­side of his com­fort zone. This could also indi­cate a strong sense of loy­alty. If his cir­cle of friends has a large vari­ety then, yeah, that’s some­one who’s not afraid to mix things up and prob­a­bly open to newer expe­ri­ences and offers some­thing new more often.

7.Does He Have a Favorite Team? - Men who really enjoy sports also tend to have a com­pet­i­tive atti­tude and also tend to be pas­sion­ate. This is also some­thing that he may share with his bud­dies on a reg­u­lar basis. Not a bad thing, but watch­ing the game, espe­cially if it’s the play­offs, may trump your plans or spontaneity.

8.His Bad Habits.—Does he gam­ble? Does he flirt with the help, like the wait­ress? Does he fail to keep up on the laun­dry? Does he inter­rupt you while you’re talk­ing? Keep an eye out for some of his warn­ing signs… Maybe they’re endear­ing at first, but these lit­tle nuggets of info let you know what you’re deal­ing with and just know these things prob­a­bly aren’t going any­where. Can you deal with them?

9.What does He Spend His Money on? —If you’re look­ing for a mature guy and he spends his money on comic book char­ac­ter bust sculp­tures, main­tain­ing his ten World of War­craft monthly mem­ber­ships or updat­ing his awe­some home enter­tain­ment sys­tem then that might be an issue. A guy that knows where he’s headed plans for it, saves for it and gets there by being a respon­si­ble spender. If he’s spend­ing things on more triv­ial items that may indi­cate that he’s more of a free fun lov­ing spirit… It really depends what you are look­ing for in order to know if either way he spends his money is bad for you.

10.How Does he Talk About Mom?—Again, there are no absolutes here, but if a guy has a poor rela­tion­ship with mom, that can some­times raise a red flag. The mom is one of the most impor­tant rela­tion­ships a guy devel­ops in his life­time. If a guy has issues with his mom then it can some­times be harder for him to under­stand, respect and even trust the new gal in his life. How­ever, if he’s had issues with his mom and can say, pos­i­tively, that he’s worked them out or that he knows they need improve­ment then that is a pos­i­tive. The other side to that is the mama’s boy. The guy who can’t get enough of mom and that puts you in a com­pe­ti­tion to win atten­tion from his mom…

Do these all work every time? Sev­enty per­cent of the time they work every time. So keep that in mind when read­ing up on this list.

Alex Vasquez is the founder and Creative Director of Design at DigiSavvy, Inc (digisavvy.com), a creative web design and social media marketing agency focusing on business branding based in Orange County, CA.

How to Summit Life’s Everyday Mountains

How to Summit Life’s Everyday Mountains

Don’t give up on your dreams.

“The man who moves a mountain begins by carrying away small stones.” ~Confucius

Editor’s note: This is a guest post from Scott Dinsmore of ReadingForYourSuccess.

How can a mountain better prepare us for life? At over 14,000 feet, there’s more to learn than I would have thought.

Last week I sat on top of Mt. Shasta, a 14,179 foot mountain in Northern California. It was my first real summit and I was proud. Getting there took me through two days of snow, ice and below-freezing camping conditions, using crampons, an ice axe, and more layers than I thought I owned.

As I climbed, and especially on my way down, I began to realize the lessons required to reach the top and make it back down safely. As it turns out, the most important rules are just as relevant in the snow as they are in conquering our everyday challenges.

When was the last time you reached a mountain summit, whether outdoors or in life?
We face our own mountains everyday. Some small. Some big. There’s always a summit we want to reach. Maybe it’s running those few miles before work, making that intimidating sales call, or running your business. Goals, no matter the size, require a strategy for success.

A cold tall mountain reinforced an approach that can convert life’s everyday challenges into gratifying accomplishments.

A Guide to Reaching Life’s Summits:

Pack light. I wish I took this more seriously. Every unnecessary piece of gear complicates things and detracts from the experience. Aside from the bare necessities, things do not make life better. They often cause more stress and keep you from what’s most important. The lighter your pack the better. Life is too short to be burdened with excessive possessions, emotional baggage or regrets. Positive thoughts, relationships and experiences weigh nothing at all. Pile them on and leave the rest behind. They’ll lift you to the top.

Take one step at a time. Any major accomplishment can be broken down into a series of single steps. My pattern for the mountain was 15 steps up, 15 breaths of rest. I did that for 7 hours. If I would have only focused on the very top, frustration would have overcome me. If your summit is too intimidating, break it into smaller steps. Focus on those one by one. Eventually one step will be the one that puts you on top.

Don’t go at it alone. When climbing, a partner is a must. For safety, support, camaraderie, motivation and simply to share the journey. You’d be silly (and putting yourself in great danger) to go up alone. Life is meant to be experienced with others. It makes the valleys shallower and the peaks higher. Relationships magnify experiences and help you do things that prove impossible alone. Don’t leave home without your support team.

Listen to the experts. Halfway up, a passing guide told us if we couldn’t get to the top by 12:30 at the latest, then to turn back. Chances of late day thunderstorms were too great. As amateurs we would have had no idea. While we all ought to experience our own paths, it’s foolish not to learn from and observe the guidance of experts. Choose your life models wisely and keep them close by on your journey.

Slow down. As Yvon Chouinard of Patagonia says, “It’s about how you got there. Not what you’ve accomplished.” Despite what colleagues and competitors may tell you, there is no rush. Rushing on the mountain risks slipping, not acclimating to thinning air, exhaustion and possibly death. In life the biggest risk is that you miss the wonders of everyday experiences in your pursuit to the top. The top is secondary to the process.

Look back and take in the view. There’s never any guarantee that you’ll get to the top, but you always have the ability to stop, take in a deep breath, smile and enjoy the view-whether it’s miles of wilderness or two feet of fog. It’s all wonderful. Every moment of life is a new view to appreciate.

Save some energy for the trip down. We thought the summit was “just over that peak” half a dozen times before it actually was. Conserve energy. Things will inevitably take longer than expected. Don’t be discouraged. Budget your capital, energy and drive appropriately. Rarely is anything in life an all out sprint. Treat it like a marathon. You may need your reserves when you least expect it.

Getting to the top is optional. Getting down is mandatory. These are Ed Viesturs’ famous words; the first U.S. man to summit all 14 peaks above 8,000 meters with no bottled oxygen. The summit will be there tomorrow and likely so will yours. If more planning, a stronger team or more support is required, then save the summit for a time when the payout is safer and more probable. If you are outmatched, know when to turn back, only to return stronger and more savvy tomorrow. Stay objective and don’t let short-term excitement get in the way of long-term fulfillment.

Failure is a part of the process. If we would have started our climb the week before, conditions would have been too grave to make it. Be ok with not reaching the summit every time. Falling short is inevitable. You will never learn more than from your failures…at anything. Embrace them.

A daunting summit is nothing more than a challenge. A challenge is simply an opportunity in disguise. You won’t summit every one you come across, but you will become a better person with each attempt.

There will always be another mountain. You are not meant to conquer them all. Past summits are simply preparing you for the next. With the right strategy, you’ll put the top within reach. When your summit arrives, you will be ready.

“It is not the mountains we conquer but ourselves.” ~Sir Edmund Hillary

Read more inspiring articles from Scott Dinsmore at Reading For Your Success where he is committed to discovering your own path to personal and career success, on your terms, through “action-based reading.”

Believing in Your Own Abilities!

‎"There is no limit to what you can imagine. And with commitment, with effort, what you can imagine you can become. Put your mind to work for you. Believe that you can do it. The world will tell you that you can't. Yet, in your belief you'll find the strength, you'll find the ability, to do it anyway." Ralph Marston

If I listened to everyone who said that this was no time to start a print publication with the economy the way it is, I would have never proceeded with my passion to publish Southern New England Woman. The critics were everywhere. "Advertising money is down" they said. You won't be able to print a "high quality" magazine because "it's too expensive". How did they know that? Did they already try it themselves? Not to my knowledge...

In my opinion, it turned out to be the best time to start a publication. You have to believe that things are always going to get better and to leverage yourself in the best position possible for when they do, to me, was the key to making Southern New England Woman work. Being a "how" thinker gets alot more accomplished than being an "if" thinker. That and treating people with respect and a personal commitment to do your best.

I have been fortunate in a way that I am most grateful for my own persistence. I have created several long term businesses. A photographer and makeup artist for seventeen years having no official training or formal education in the industry. Pageant director, trade show and event producer for fifteen years, also with no official training or formal education in the industry and now publisher of this fabulous new magazine. I'm not trying to toot my own horn, what I
"am" trying to do is explain to people that it "can" be done. You can create your dream job if "you-yourself", have the will to do it.

It's exciting to take something, an idea, a thought, and build it. If I didn't believe in myself and go forward to pursue my dreams, where would I be? What would I be doing? The one question I asked myself in every case was "what's the worst thing that could happen if I did this". My answer was "as long as my family was safe and healthy, it would only cost me a life experience if it didn't work". To me that was a win - win!

I've learned alot by doing my own research and step by step learning every aspect of the industry from the ground up. I wouldn't trade it for anything. Don't be anxious to get things done quickly. Success takes time, effort and the fortitude to put your heart and soul into what you really want. When you rush to get things done fast, or just to get them "done", you prevent yourself the advantage of utimatelty accomplishing much greater things and missing out on the many life experiences creating something new has to offer.

I guess the point of this post is this...
I hear from many people on Facebook, Twitter and LinkedIn, etc., who ask questions like, I have a business idea but I don't know if I should go forward. Not sure how to proceed with 'my" dream job. I lost my job and am looking to start my own business but I am not sure if I can.

Now, I certainly don't consider myself a professional business coach in any respect, however, if I could give one piece of advice that is as important as anything else, it would be this. Ask yourself, what "your" passion is, what can "you" do to learn everything you can about your industry of choice and... "what is the worst thing that could happen if you try"?

I love this quote: Real confidence comes from knowing and accepting yourself, your strengths and your limitations. I was once afraid of people saying, "Who does she think she is?" Now I have the courage to stand and say, "This is who I am."--Oprah Winfrey