The “things” we have will come and go, but the memories... will be with us forever.

SNE WOMAN (THE MAGAZINE); Speaks two trends; the importance and value of promoting local businesses, products and services and the general growing concept of living one's best life.

SNE WOMAN (THE BLOG); Touches on general issues facing women today. Like the publication, it's meant to help you come away with a renewed sense of self. To encourage you to learn something new. A tip or suggestion that makes you say... “I need to try this.”, or, “I never knew that before”. Hopefully this blog will become another tool for you to use, that will help you focus on finding the right questions, in order to make your life better, live your dream easier, and become a happier you.



My name is Pat Paolino Cruz and I am the creator here. I am a single mom with three kids and come from a loud Italian family. My kids are Italian and Hawaiian. Very cool combo if I do say so myself. I wear many hats and have created several different businesses which have kept me very connected to women. I am not a blogger or a writer, however, I thought it was important to chat directly to you. We are all different, but at the same time, are all the same. It isn't easy to do what we do. To wear all the hats we wear. There are so many topics that we can discuss here, together, that will help us along our paths. My hope is that you find something in one of the posts to comment on and share your own views. To offer your insight and personal stories that may in some way, help create clarity in another woman's life who may also be reading this blog. And, ok, here is a bit of information upfront... Sometimes I get so busy and I before you know it, another week is over. I know you can relate. Those are the times I may not be able to give you my own personally written story, however, I will give you something I believe has equal importance. A topic that helps us discuss something I really didn't know that much about to begin with, but believe it's something we can all benefit from by reading.

You know how the Seinfeld episodes were described... “The Show About Nothing.” Well, I think this blog will probably go in the same direction. There is nothing earth shattering I want to say. Nothing that will be “breaking news” for the week. Just stuff. Stuff about us. Stuff for us. Stuff to help us become better women. And I say “us” because I am in fact, a woman, with the same issues you have. Possibly more...lol.... In any event, it isn't easy being a woman today. Sometimes I find myself up at three in the morning (as I am now), researching, writing, responding or doing general follow up work I wasn't able to get to all day. I did take a little nap from about midnight (when Criminal Minds, my favorite show, was over) until about 2am when I woke up and thought... ugh, I forgot to...(fill in the blank). I'm sure you do the same thing. It's not that I was busy all day long, working 24/7. It's that, I have kids. It's summer and they are home with me. I have a home office which makes it easy for me to work on my own schedule. It may be the middle of the night, but it allows me to sit and hang out with my kids, take them to the beach on a hot day or just enjoy a movie together before they go to bed. I don't remember my parents spending much time with me when I was a kid. They were busy, they worked a lot. I don't want my kids to have “un-fun” memories. I enjoy being the “go to the beach mom”, or the “go camping (yes, in a tent) mom”, or the “let's go to the fireworks tonight mom”.

I know it's hard because we all have so many responsibilities.... Chef, maid, worker, bank, taxi service, mother, daughter, caretaker, teacher, activities specialist. Sometimes I slack off. I know I am completely at fault when it comes to putting off work to spend a little time with my kids. I know. Terrible thing to do when you have your own business but you know, I decided a long time ago that I didn't want to punch a clock. I wanted to be accessible for my kids and be a little more of a free spirit if I could. If I have to choose what's most important to me, it's to let my kids remember fun times. Like any kids, they will probably still think I worked too much anyway...lol... and I do work a lot, however, I want them to also remember that I wasn't afraid to get dirty. To sleep on the ground in a sleeping bag with them or to take off on a moment's notice for a quick picnic in the middle of the day. I know lots of women don't have the luxury of taking off in the middle of the day to do something special possibly by themselves (a long pedicure, an hour in the park with a blanket and a book), with friends, a spouse or with their kids, however, nights and weekends count and no matter what time you do have, you need to make the best of it. If you want to do it, you will find the time. In the end, no matter what you do in life, you learn that people and the moments are all that matter. Do what you can, to make them good ones.

Ok, I see already that I wrote about nothing. Actually, I wanted to just spill a bit of what was on my mind and give you a bit of the way I am. Maybe you've gotten the gist of the way I am in previous posts but for some reason, I felt like I wanted to start from scratch and take you from this point on. Maybe it's because I am getting ready to go to press with the next issue of the magazine and it's like a new beginning all over again. What ever it is, I hope that you stay with us and take some time once in awhile to write a few comments down yourself about what's going on in your life and what you would like to chat about. It really is all about us... women... the glue that holds everyone around us together.... and we do it with four bones that we women sport so fabulously... Our Funny bone, our backbone, our cheekbones and most importantly our wishbone...

Choose your priorities carefully... Wishing you happiness in your day!

10 Things You Can Learn About a Guy in 3 Dates or Less

I came across this little tidbit and couldn't help sharing with you. Interesting to get a man's perspectie on this... What do you think?


10 Things You Can Learn About a Guy in 3 Dates or Less

There are no absolutes in the world, save for the whole bit about death and taxes. This is espe­cially true in the dat­ing world. Dat­ing web­sites are sup­posed to help us with this, to a degree. How­ever, peo­ple tend to fluff them­selves and fil­ter out key pieces of infor­ma­tion aka “deal break­ers.” Get­ting to know some­one is fun, but the prob­lem is that it takes time… No one wants to waste time. So I’m gonna give the ladies a lit­tle some­thin’ some­thin’ to help with fil­ter­ing out men they may not be into.

1.Messy or Clean? - There’s a dif­fer­ence between a guy who lives per­fectly pris­tine, mildly mess or OMGWTFBBQFTL is that an Opos­sum watch­ing ‘Weeds’ on your couch, with the remote!!!? If you dig some­one who is metic­u­lous and, per­haps, a bit obses­sive with clean­li­ness this guy may be for you. A mildly messy guy shows some­one who is lose, goes with the flow and is open minded. They could also be sloppy, or just a bit lazy, if not imma­ture. Some­one liv­ing in what seems like the rem­nants of Cher­nobyl is some­one that has more issues going on than just their liv­ing area. Be pre­pared and bring your gloves.

2.Traf­fic: Man, traf­fic sucks, or You piece of @#$% go @#$% your­self!!!—A man’s tem­pera­ment should be a key indi­ca­tor to the suc­cess of any rela­tion­ship you look to jump into. A guy curs­ing at and run­ning cars off the road is a sure warn­ing sign, or it should be. Maybe you like guys with anger man­age­ment issues… It’s pos­si­ble to be too upset and too mel­low, they are extreme sides of the same coin, really. If a guy doesn’t care he’s just been cut off and put in dan­ger, then that could indi­cate that the guy doesn’t stand up for himself.

3.Pub­lic Dis­plays of Affec­tion (PDA) - As with the ‘Three Bears Story,’ there’s too much, too lit­tle and just right. Obvi­ously, it’s up to you to know which is right for you. A guy that’s hold­ing you and grop­ing you, oth­er­wise smoth­er­ing you, out in pub­lic prob­a­bly has a need to show you off, or to show that he’s got some­one and that the world needs to know about it. It’s val­i­da­tion, in some way. If the guy’s roman­tic way to end an evening is with a fist bump, then he’s prob­a­bly not sure if he’s really into you or not, or could be lack­ing confidence.

4.What Does he Order for Din­ner?—What your guy orders can be telling also. Is he a mac and cheese kind of guy. Does he avoid the hip eatery around the cor­ner? Does he run and hide at the men­tion of a late night taco truck run? Is he oth­er­wise happy with Ham­burger helper? These are not inher­ently bad things. They just serve as a gauge for you to know how open he is to dif­fer­ent things. Some­one that isn’t into exotic foods, or just try­ing new and dif­fer­ent places may be some­one not keen for try­ing too many dif­fer­ent things…

5.How Does He Pre­fer to Com­mu­ni­cate?—Does your guy send you text mes­sages all the time? Does he take the time to call? If he has to break his plans will call, email or text you? If he calls you more often than not, espe­cially when some­thing comes up, this indi­cates that he’s a bit more con­sid­er­ate and able to pony up and “be a man” when things get rough. If he’s tex­ting a lot, or email­ing, he may just not be sure if he’s com­pletely into you, or sim­ply, he may not be as mature as you’d like.

6.His Group of Friends. —The entourage that he rolls with; who do the con­sist of? Are they high school friends, nearly exclu­sively? Or is it a pretty good mix of peo­ple from var­i­ous stages of his life? If he keeps the com­pany of the peo­ple that he’s known since high school (aka for­ever) then he may have issues with trust and/or could be averse to change or step­ping out­side of his com­fort zone. This could also indi­cate a strong sense of loy­alty. If his cir­cle of friends has a large vari­ety then, yeah, that’s some­one who’s not afraid to mix things up and prob­a­bly open to newer expe­ri­ences and offers some­thing new more often.

7.Does He Have a Favorite Team? - Men who really enjoy sports also tend to have a com­pet­i­tive atti­tude and also tend to be pas­sion­ate. This is also some­thing that he may share with his bud­dies on a reg­u­lar basis. Not a bad thing, but watch­ing the game, espe­cially if it’s the play­offs, may trump your plans or spontaneity.

8.His Bad Habits.—Does he gam­ble? Does he flirt with the help, like the wait­ress? Does he fail to keep up on the laun­dry? Does he inter­rupt you while you’re talk­ing? Keep an eye out for some of his warn­ing signs… Maybe they’re endear­ing at first, but these lit­tle nuggets of info let you know what you’re deal­ing with and just know these things prob­a­bly aren’t going any­where. Can you deal with them?

9.What does He Spend His Money on? —If you’re look­ing for a mature guy and he spends his money on comic book char­ac­ter bust sculp­tures, main­tain­ing his ten World of War­craft monthly mem­ber­ships or updat­ing his awe­some home enter­tain­ment sys­tem then that might be an issue. A guy that knows where he’s headed plans for it, saves for it and gets there by being a respon­si­ble spender. If he’s spend­ing things on more triv­ial items that may indi­cate that he’s more of a free fun lov­ing spirit… It really depends what you are look­ing for in order to know if either way he spends his money is bad for you.

10.How Does he Talk About Mom?—Again, there are no absolutes here, but if a guy has a poor rela­tion­ship with mom, that can some­times raise a red flag. The mom is one of the most impor­tant rela­tion­ships a guy devel­ops in his life­time. If a guy has issues with his mom then it can some­times be harder for him to under­stand, respect and even trust the new gal in his life. How­ever, if he’s had issues with his mom and can say, pos­i­tively, that he’s worked them out or that he knows they need improve­ment then that is a pos­i­tive. The other side to that is the mama’s boy. The guy who can’t get enough of mom and that puts you in a com­pe­ti­tion to win atten­tion from his mom…

Do these all work every time? Sev­enty per­cent of the time they work every time. So keep that in mind when read­ing up on this list.

Alex Vasquez is the founder and Creative Director of Design at DigiSavvy, Inc (digisavvy.com), a creative web design and social media marketing agency focusing on business branding based in Orange County, CA.

5 Simple Tips to Achieve Beautiful, Radiant, Summer Skin

Summertime is when we want our skin to glow, with radiant and flawless skin. It’s not always easy when the sun’s harmful rays are beating down on our delicate skin. Medical Aesthetician, Susan Perry, provides her expert tips to get that glow and prevent the number one cause of wrinkles, age spots, and premature aging – UV radiation.

Susan Says…

1.Check expiration dates: Check the expiration dates on your sunscreens. It’s a good idea to replace yearly and buy new ones to match to your skin type and needs. After you have thrown out the old ones, are you left with a great sunscreen that you love to use every day? Do you also have one for sport, for your body? Be sure to have the sunscreen for any occasion, on hand.

2.Best 2 in 1 product: Use a daily moisturizer that includes a full- spectrum SPF when you are indoors, near bright windows, or driving. UVA penetrates windows and damages unprotected skin. Elta MD sun care line provides a complete spectrum of sun care products, one for every skin type, and unique need.

3.Renew: Exfoliation revs up the circulation, removes dead skin cells, and gives your skin a glow. Light peels and microdermabrasion are great in office treatments. For take- home treatment, try a lovely citrus scrub for the face. Some of my favorite at-home products include Microdermabrasion Cream by Physicians Complex, BioMedic Micro Exfoliating Scrub for the Face and Body or Deep Thermal Cleanser from Societe.

4. Keep skin clear: Toners can also help clear away surface oils and grime while at the same time, they refresh, firm, and cool the skin. My favorite toners include Obagi Toner which is fresh and botanical for all skin types and Societe Conditioning Prep which tightens and brightens.

5. Protect: A typical white t- shirt gives about SPF7 and when it is wet –about SPF3. Columbia and Land’s End Sportswear offer lightweight clothing which protects up to 97.7% of harmful UV rays. These items of clothing are perfect for summer sailing or hiking.

This summer, be sun-smart and take care of your skin. Follow these five easy tips, and get skin that radiates all summer long!

About Susan Perry:
Originally from England, Susan completed her training in Applied Aesthetics and Physiatrics in London. She has been working with plastic surgeon, Dr. Donald Brown, since 1993.Together, she and Dr. Brown created one of the first medical skin care programs in the United States. Throughout her career, Susan Perry has been dedicated to continuing education and has attended many advanced training schools and seminars. She is devoted to exploring the latest, most advanced skin care techniques and products available, eagerly integrating the most effective and promising of these into the practice.

How to Summit Life’s Everyday Mountains

How to Summit Life’s Everyday Mountains

Don’t give up on your dreams.

“The man who moves a mountain begins by carrying away small stones.” ~Confucius

Editor’s note: This is a guest post from Scott Dinsmore of ReadingForYourSuccess.

How can a mountain better prepare us for life? At over 14,000 feet, there’s more to learn than I would have thought.

Last week I sat on top of Mt. Shasta, a 14,179 foot mountain in Northern California. It was my first real summit and I was proud. Getting there took me through two days of snow, ice and below-freezing camping conditions, using crampons, an ice axe, and more layers than I thought I owned.

As I climbed, and especially on my way down, I began to realize the lessons required to reach the top and make it back down safely. As it turns out, the most important rules are just as relevant in the snow as they are in conquering our everyday challenges.

When was the last time you reached a mountain summit, whether outdoors or in life?
We face our own mountains everyday. Some small. Some big. There’s always a summit we want to reach. Maybe it’s running those few miles before work, making that intimidating sales call, or running your business. Goals, no matter the size, require a strategy for success.

A cold tall mountain reinforced an approach that can convert life’s everyday challenges into gratifying accomplishments.

A Guide to Reaching Life’s Summits:

Pack light. I wish I took this more seriously. Every unnecessary piece of gear complicates things and detracts from the experience. Aside from the bare necessities, things do not make life better. They often cause more stress and keep you from what’s most important. The lighter your pack the better. Life is too short to be burdened with excessive possessions, emotional baggage or regrets. Positive thoughts, relationships and experiences weigh nothing at all. Pile them on and leave the rest behind. They’ll lift you to the top.

Take one step at a time. Any major accomplishment can be broken down into a series of single steps. My pattern for the mountain was 15 steps up, 15 breaths of rest. I did that for 7 hours. If I would have only focused on the very top, frustration would have overcome me. If your summit is too intimidating, break it into smaller steps. Focus on those one by one. Eventually one step will be the one that puts you on top.

Don’t go at it alone. When climbing, a partner is a must. For safety, support, camaraderie, motivation and simply to share the journey. You’d be silly (and putting yourself in great danger) to go up alone. Life is meant to be experienced with others. It makes the valleys shallower and the peaks higher. Relationships magnify experiences and help you do things that prove impossible alone. Don’t leave home without your support team.

Listen to the experts. Halfway up, a passing guide told us if we couldn’t get to the top by 12:30 at the latest, then to turn back. Chances of late day thunderstorms were too great. As amateurs we would have had no idea. While we all ought to experience our own paths, it’s foolish not to learn from and observe the guidance of experts. Choose your life models wisely and keep them close by on your journey.

Slow down. As Yvon Chouinard of Patagonia says, “It’s about how you got there. Not what you’ve accomplished.” Despite what colleagues and competitors may tell you, there is no rush. Rushing on the mountain risks slipping, not acclimating to thinning air, exhaustion and possibly death. In life the biggest risk is that you miss the wonders of everyday experiences in your pursuit to the top. The top is secondary to the process.

Look back and take in the view. There’s never any guarantee that you’ll get to the top, but you always have the ability to stop, take in a deep breath, smile and enjoy the view-whether it’s miles of wilderness or two feet of fog. It’s all wonderful. Every moment of life is a new view to appreciate.

Save some energy for the trip down. We thought the summit was “just over that peak” half a dozen times before it actually was. Conserve energy. Things will inevitably take longer than expected. Don’t be discouraged. Budget your capital, energy and drive appropriately. Rarely is anything in life an all out sprint. Treat it like a marathon. You may need your reserves when you least expect it.

Getting to the top is optional. Getting down is mandatory. These are Ed Viesturs’ famous words; the first U.S. man to summit all 14 peaks above 8,000 meters with no bottled oxygen. The summit will be there tomorrow and likely so will yours. If more planning, a stronger team or more support is required, then save the summit for a time when the payout is safer and more probable. If you are outmatched, know when to turn back, only to return stronger and more savvy tomorrow. Stay objective and don’t let short-term excitement get in the way of long-term fulfillment.

Failure is a part of the process. If we would have started our climb the week before, conditions would have been too grave to make it. Be ok with not reaching the summit every time. Falling short is inevitable. You will never learn more than from your failures…at anything. Embrace them.

A daunting summit is nothing more than a challenge. A challenge is simply an opportunity in disguise. You won’t summit every one you come across, but you will become a better person with each attempt.

There will always be another mountain. You are not meant to conquer them all. Past summits are simply preparing you for the next. With the right strategy, you’ll put the top within reach. When your summit arrives, you will be ready.

“It is not the mountains we conquer but ourselves.” ~Sir Edmund Hillary

Read more inspiring articles from Scott Dinsmore at Reading For Your Success where he is committed to discovering your own path to personal and career success, on your terms, through “action-based reading.”

Leo Babauta has one of my favorite blog sites. Here is one of his latest posts.

Get Off Your Butt: 16 Ways to Get Motivated When You’re in a Slump

Post written by Leo Babauta.

Even the most motivated of us — you, me, Tony Robbins — can feel unmotivated at times. In fact, sometimes we get into such a slump that even thinking about making positive changes seems too difficult.

But it’s not hopeless: with some small steps, baby ones in fact, you can get started down the road to positive change.

Yes, I know, it seems impossible at times. You don’t feel like doing anything. I’ve been there, and in fact I still feel that way from time to time. You’re not alone. But I’ve learned a few ways to break out of a slump, and we’ll take a look at those today.

This post was inspired by reader Roy C. Carlson, who asked:

“I was wondering if you could do a piece on why it can be hard for someone to change direction and start taking control of their life. I have to say I’m in this boat and advice on getting out of my slump would be great.”

Roy is just one of many with a slump like that. Again, I feel that way sometimes myself, and in fact sometimes I struggle to motivate myself to exercise — and I’ll use that as an example of how to break out of the slump.

When I fall out of exercise, due to illness or injury or disruption from things going on in my life, it’s hard to get started again. I don’t even feel like thinking about it, sometimes. But I’ve always found a way to break out of that slump, and here are some things I’ve learned that have helped:

One Goal. Whenever I’ve been in a slump, I’ve discovered that it’s often because I have too much going on in my life. I’m trying to do too much. And it saps my energy and motivation. It’s probably the most common mistake that people make: they try to take on too much, try to accomplish too many goals at once. You cannot maintain energy and focus (the two most important things in accomplishing a goal) if you are trying to do two or more goals at once. It’s not possible — I’ve tried it many times. You have to choose one goal, for now, and focus on it completely. I know, that’s hard. Still, I speak from experience. You can always do your other goals when you’ve accomplished your One Goal.

Find inspiration. Inspiration, for me, comes from others who have achieved what I want to achieve, or who are currently doing it. I read other blogs, books, magazines. I Google my goal, and read success stories. Zen Habits is just one place for inspiration, not only from me but from many readers who have achieved amazing things.

Get excited. This sounds obvious, but most people don’t think about it much: if you want to break out of a slump, get yourself excited about a goal. But how can you do that when you don’t feel motivated? Well, it starts with inspiration from others (see above), but you have to take that excitement and build on it. For me, I’ve learned that by talking to my wife about it, and to others, and reading as much about it as possible, and visualizing what it would be like to be successful (seeing the benefits of the goal in my head), I get excited about a goal. Once I’ve done that, it’s just a matter of carrying that energy forward and keeping it going.

Build anticipation. This will sound hard, and many people will skip this tip. But it really works. It helped me quit smoking after many failed attempts. If you find inspiration and want to do a goal, don’t start right away. Many of us will get excited and want to start today. That’s a mistake. Set a date in the future — a week or two, or even a month — and make that your Start Date. Mark it on the calendar.

Get excited about that date. Make it the most important date in your life. In the meantime, start writing out a plan. And do some of the steps below. Because by delaying your start, you are building anticipation, and increasing your focus and energy for your goal.

Post your goal. Print out your goal in big words. Make your goal just a few words long, like a mantra (“Exercise 15 mins. Daily”), and post it up on your wall or refrigerator. Post it at home and work. Put it on your computer desktop. You want to have big reminders about your goal, to keep your focus and keep your excitement going. A picture of your goal (like a model with sexy abs, for example) also helps.

Commit publicly. None of us likes to look bad in front of others. We will go the extra mile to do something we’ve said publicly. For example, when I wanted to run my first marathon, I started writing a column about it in my local daily newspaper. The entire island of Guam (pop. 160K) knew about my goal. I couldn’t back down, and even though my motivation came and went, I stuck with it and completed it. Now, you don’t have to commit to your goal in your daily newspaper, but you can do it with friends and family and co-workers, and you can do it on your blog if you have one. And hold yourself accountable — don’t just commit once, but commit to giving progress updates to everyone every week or so.

Think about it daily. If you think about your goal every day, it is much more likely to become true. To this end, posting the goal on your wall or computer desktop (as mentioned above) helps a lot. Sending yourself daily reminders also helps. And if you can commit to doing one small thing to further your goal (even just 5 minutes) every single day, your goal will almost certainly come true.

Get support. It’s hard to accomplish something alone. When I decided to run my marathon, I had the help of friends and family, and I had a great running community on Guam who encouraged me at 5K races and did long runs with me. When I decided to quit smoking, I joined an online forum and that helped tremendously. And of course, my wife Eva helped every step of the way. I couldn’t have done these goals without her, or without the others who supported me. Find your support network, either in the real world or online, or both.

Realize that there’s an ebb and flow. Motivation is not a constant thing that is always there for you. It comes and goes, and comes and goes again, like the tide. But realize that while it may go away, it doesn’t do so permanently. It will come back. Just stick it out and wait for that motivation to come back. In the meantime, read about your goal (see below), ask for help (see below), and do some of the other things listed here until your motivation comes back.

Stick with it. Whatever you do, don’t give up. Even if you aren’t feeling any motivation today, or this week, don’t give up. Again, that motivation will come back. Think of your goal as a long journey, and your slump is just a little bump in the road. You can’t give up with every little bump. Stay with it for the long term, ride out the ebbs and surf on the flows, and you’ll get there.

Start small. Really small. If you are having a hard time getting started, it may be because you’re thinking too big. If you want to exercise, for example, you may be thinking that you have to do these intense workouts 5 days a week. No — instead, do small, tiny, baby steps. Just do 2 minutes of exercise. I know, that sounds wimpy. But it works. Commit to 2 minutes of exercise for one week. You may want to do more, but just stick to 2 minutes. It’s so easy, you can’t fail. Do it at the same time, every day. Just some crunches, 2 pushups, and some jogging in place. Once you’ve done 2 minutes a day for a week, increase it to 5, and stick with that for a week. In a month, you’ll be doing 15-20. Want to wake up early? Don’t think about waking at 5 a.m. Instead, think about waking 10 minutes earlier for a week. That’s all. Once you’ve done that, wake 10 minutes earlier than that. Baby steps.

Build on small successes. Again, if you start small for a week, you’re going to be successful. You can’t fail if you start with something ridiculously easy. Who can’t exercise for 2 minutes? (If that’s you, I apologize.) And you’ll feel successful, and good about yourself. Take that successful feeling and build on it, with another baby step. Add 2-3 minutes to your exercise routine, for example. With each step (and each step should last about a week), you will feel even more successful. Make each step really, really small, and you won’t fail. After a couple of months, your tiny steps will add up to a lot of progress and a lot of success.

Read about it daily. When I lose motivation, I just read a book or blog about my goal. It inspires me and reinvigorates me. For some reason, reading helps motivate and focus you on whatever you’re reading about. So read about your goal every day, if you can, especially when you’re not feeling motivated.

Call for help when your motivation ebbs. Having trouble? Ask for help. Email me. Join an online forum. Get a partner to join you. Call your mom. It doesn’t matter who, just tell them your problems, and talking about it will help. Ask them for advice. Ask them to help you overcome your slump. It works.

Think about the benefits, not the difficulties. One common problem is that we think about how hard something is. Exercise sounds so hard! Just thinking about it makes you tired. But instead of thinking about how hard something is, think about what you will get out of it. For example, instead of thinking about how tiring exercise can be, focus on how good you’ll feel when you’re done, and how you’ll be healthier and slimmer over the long run. The benefits of something will help energize you.

Squash negative thoughts; replace them with positive ones. Along those lines, it’s important to start monitoring your thoughts. Recognize negative self-talk, which is really what’s causing your slump. Just spend a few days becoming aware of every negative thought. Then, after a few days, try squashing those negative thoughts like a bug, and then replacing them with a corresponding positive thought. Squash, “This is too hard!” and replace it with, “I can do this! If that wimp Leo can do it, so can I!” It sounds corny, but it works. Really.

Car Purchasing Tips for Women

I receive articles every day to be considered for publication in SNEWoman Magazine. Unfortunately, we just can't fit them all in the issues. That being said; I've decided to post some of the articles received here on the blog for your review. Hopefully you will get some great information out of them and on a regular basis. This particular article was submitted regarding Women and Car Purchases. Happy Reading!

Car Purchasing Tips for Women

The automobile industry is changing the way people purchase or lease vehicles. This article is to point out how women should adapt their automobile needs and finances to work best for their overall lifestyles. Here are some interesting facts and statistics :

1. Women buy more than 65% of all new vehicles, and even if they're not the ones signing the check, they are a decisive influence in 93% of all vehicle purchases, according to Road And Travel Magazine's market research.

2. J.D. Powers and Associates found that female car buyers pay an average of 0.2% more on their cars.

3. According to a Consumer Reports survey, 69% of women use a variety of sources to research before buying a car, compared to 86% of men. Women also seem to be shy about negotiating the price, with 68% of women talking numbers with the dealer, as opposed to 76% of men.

Now that we can see that women are the primary buyers, lets put some helpful hints together for you to make your buying experience, a smarter and more efficient one.

A. Identify your financial situation before you start. Determine how much you can spend on a vehicle per month if you should have a payment. Find out your credit score before you start.

B. Should you lease or buy? If you like to change vehicles every 2-3 years, you drive 15,000 miles or less per year, and you don't plan on putting a lot of money as a down payment, then leasing may be the way to go. The example I give is that a women buys a $25,000 car. She takes a 72 month car loan of $349 per month. Adding up the cost of tires, brakes, etch, her monthly cost will rise to $400 per month. Wouldn't it make sense to lease a NEW vehicle for 36 months , then get another one after that? Many women say well "I don't own the leased car" When you have a 72 month loan, you don't own that car either. Decide if it makes sense to pay a loan of $350 per month after 3 years with 3 years left? At this halfway point in your loan, you may have already lost 50% of its value.

C. DON'T buy a payment, buy or lease the vehicle that you WANT. So many people buy a car for the payment and end up disliking the car for years as they write their monthly loan check. Even worse, some people trade their car in and lose thousands of dollars, trying to buy a payment, instead of the RIGHT vehicle for themselves.

D. Consider insurance, gas mileage, and property taxes, as part of your monthly vehicle expenses.

E. Should you look at new or preowned? Preowned is a great option if you can purchase a 2-3 year old vehicle with an extended certified warrantee. (extend the original new car warrantee for additional time)

F. Do your research on the internet. Many purchases are done over the internet today. It's a great resource tool!

G. Go to a dealer who, you trust with a great service department. When you go to the showroom after doing your due diligence, make sure the salesperson you are dealing with, feels comfortable to you. If not, ask the Sales Manager to speak to another person. You need to feel that the sales person is working in your best interest and that you can put your trust in them to help you make the right decisions.

Robert Fioravanti is a Corporate Sales Director at Inskip Automall and can be reached at rfioravanti@penskeautomotive.com.

The Wastefulness of Decluttering; or How to Make Less Count for More

Post written by Leo Babauta. Follow him twitter.

Don’t throw the good away with the bad.
‘It is preoccupation with possession, more than anything else, that prevents men from living freely and nobly.’ ~Bertrand Russell

I know there are many of you who want to declutter, or who have already gotten started … but you hit a roadblock.

And it’s a big one: you don’t want to be wasteful. Your gut tells you that getting rid of perfectly good things — things that cost a pretty penny to get in the first place — is wasteful as hell.

I recently received this letter from Marissa, a brilliant reader:

“I am currently going through my possessions for the umpteenth time to have/own less. My issue I am having now, is that when I donate/throw away items I don’t “need” I feel like I am wasting money. At one point in time I used my hard earned money to buy this item and now I just want to get rid of it. Though this does help in my future shopping habits so I don’t buy anything on a whim or just because I want to have it, I feel like I am throwing away money into the trash/donation bins.”

This is such a common question that I thought I’d address it here — if you’re holding onto stuff because you feel it would be a waste of good money if you got rid of it, here is the answer you are looking for:

I hereby release you of your burden.

You are free. You bought these items with hard-earned money, and you don’t want that money to go to waste, so you’ve been holding onto them. It’s a burden that keeps you from freeing yourself of these unneeded possessions — it forces to you keep the space they occupy, to maintain these possessions, to constantly see them every day even if you don’t want them, to walk around them or trip over them or live in a cramped, cluttered space. This is a burden, paying penance for your initial wasted expenditure of cash.

But: the waste was when you bought it, not when you get rid of it. You bought something you didn’t really need — and the real waste would be to ignore this and not learn from it.

So here’s how to make sure that by decluttering possessions you don’t need, it’s not a waste:

1. Learn your lesson. This might sound condescending, but it’s not meant to be — if we don’t realize our mistakes, we can’t learn and avoid them in the future. So realize: you shouldn’t have bought the items in the first place. Avoid doing this in the future, by buying as little as you possibly can. Stop being a consumer, and start living.

2. Realize that keeping the items is wasteful. If you keep stuff you don’t need, it costs you money — you pay for the space to store it (lots of possessions means bigger homes or storage containers), you pay to maintain it, it costs you time (and therefore money) to keep it and go around it, you have to fix things when they break, you have to sort through things to find things, you spend time moving things around, and so on. Getting rid of this unnecessary stuff frees you of this waste.

3. Find someone who will use it. It’s a waste to keep something when you’re not using it (a good reason car-sharing is a much better use of cars than private ownership, btw). So find a friend or family member who needs it, or give it to Goodwill or some other such charity, or donate it to a library that will let many others use it. Consider starting a neighborhood tool library, or a book-sharing spot in your community. When someone else uses your items, it’s not a waste.

4. Test the waters. If you’re unsure of whether you’ll need something later, put it to a test: have you used it in the last six months? If not, you probably don’t need it (unless it’s seasonal — then ask if you needed it in the last year). If you’re still unsure, box it up with today’s date, and check on it in six months — if you never needed to open the box, you didn’t need it.

5. Don’t let your possessions own you. If you hold on to possessions because you feel it would be wasteful to get rid of them, they are controlling you. They are dictating your life, rather than you creating the life you want, living how you want to live. Let go of possessions and be free — living otherwise would be the true waste.

6. Make better use of your time and space. Once you’re freed of this clutter, don’t waste your freed time on acquiring more stuff. Spend your time on incredible experiences, not on possessions. In the end, get a smaller house, now that you need to store less stuff, and help save the earth while you’re at it (a smaller home, along with ditching your car and becoming vegan, is one of the most important things you can do to reduce your carbon emissions).

‘Don’t water your weeds.’ ~Harvey MacKay